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Domestic psychological problems and their ensuring and proven remedies

Ubqari Magazine - December 2015

The letters of distorted families and their comprehensive answers

He does not care for anyone.

Husband is the patient of heart. Last week he was not feeling well that he was admitted in the hospital. Now I live in hospital to look after her. And his brother comes in day time. When I go then some of his friends come to live there. Son is of 15. He does not care for anybody I thought if I leave him to his father his study will be disturbed. He does not take interest, I am writing this letter from hospital.

Suggestion: you took the responsibility of home and hospital that is why he became careless. Let him sit for some hours. What doctors are saying? Do not hide the domestic problems from children of such age, neither tell exaggerate them, tell in a way that  they learn that how h to encounter the problems, with patience. If they do not take interest in your talk then do not mind. Talk to him about his problems, and let him speak. Listen with patience. Show kindness when it’s needed. He will soon understand that mother is the shadow of love. Then he will never want to see you worried. But this will not happen at once, the process of learning is a test of patience.

The ways of success

I was afraid that I will be forced to be married with my cousin, but my parents wanted me to be a doctor, there is no female doctor in our family. The boy to whom I was going to be engaged was illiterate.

Suggestion: mehar! Bear the teasing fun by family for some more time. Patience is necessary for the life of your dreams. If they say something to your mother then she should reply them. She should not involve you to save you from the anger of your father. You know that taking moral from life problems and showing patience opens the door of success, instead of complaining about the difficulties.

Peace of imagination

I have the habit to imagine thins and think them from my childhood. I assume myself as the monitor of class and I hit the boy, who annoys, with scale too much and nobody complains about it. I have done F.SC and have not got admission anywhere yet. My father is doing the business of cloths and I do Imagine myself as the owner of factory. I do not like his shop and he does not like me as free, my other two fellows are doing graduation. I am tired now after the education of 12 years. ( waseem khan, Rawalpindi)

Suggestion: the fake peace in imagination is not durable. The happiness of reality is totally different. There is difference between dream and thought. The dreams are uncontrollable while we can shape our thought either to negativity or positivity. The childhood is gone so that desires are also gone. To achieve the real happiness one has to start his task from the scratch, work with father in his shop you will get the experience and continue the study during this, you will be more successful than your friends.

After hearing the bad news:

A stress remains on my brain, I feel suffocation, and I become worried after listening the bad news of any kind. Everybody says that take care of you but I think this is selfishness and I cares for others. I think one thing that face is very dull and elder sister looks younger.

Suggestion: the face shows the condition of brain and mental condition, if you stay in pressure always then how your face be free of its effect. The bad news is bad for everybody but it does not suffocate you, or bring the big change in life matters.

There are many exercises which enables you to control the suffocation

 When you are free, close your eyes and your take breath from nose and hold it for some seconds and then expel it from your mouth, and when you take inside think that the freshness coming on your face and when you expel it out think that all pressure and negative thinking is also going away.

Wife does not love me:

I wanted to go abroad, and now an offer has come from an Arab country, first I did not believe then I called my friend and he asked me to come. Recently I got married and the job is also good enough to run the home but my wife is happy that I am going abroad. I thought that she does not love me I did not say that to her. I thought we are not aware of each other’s thinking nature.

 ( Aasir Islamabad)

Suggestion: wife's happiness does not mean that she does not love you. But she wants your success and for this she is going to sacrifice your presence with her. Actually in your prosperity her happiness is also hidden. This is to be decided by you that what is right. You have got the suggestion of your friend also. Try to note the positive and negative points of both the jobs then accept the one which has more positive points.

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